Grief is exhausting. In some ways, it is like running a marathon. You have to be in good shape and stay that way. If you are going to be able to help others you need to be good to yourself. Though I have tried to do this I forget sometimes.
I keep working on self-care, however, and here are some of the ways I am good to myself while grieving for four loved ones.
1. Get moving. Grief is an assault on body and mind, according to grief expert Therese A. Rando, PhD. Exercise is one of the best ways to treat this attack. Whether, weightlifting, cycling or walking is jazzercize, exercise helps to keep your body in good condition and after Rando ", provides an outlet for the stressful emotions of grief."
2. Add flowers. African violets have always been one of my favorite plants. Still are, but orchids are my new favorite. I always have a thriving orchid in the house. At the moment there is a spectacular pink orchid on the coffee table. FloweringPlants are an expression of life, and I am fascinated by the formation of open buds and blossoms.
3. Reward yourself. This advice comes from Helen Fitzgerald, Training Director Emeritus of the American Hospice Foundation. In her article "Self-help with Grief," Fitzgerald says you can be kind to yourself by looking at opportunities on the way to look "something." Many of our dishes broken and I was the one that was left tired. When I saw a newspaper advertisement for courtsTo 40% off sale, I have brought. I have a new set of dishes and they bring me joy every day.
4. Listen to music. Music has always been the ability to lift our spirits. A local group in my community has produced a CD for all who mourn made. What a lovely idea. Yesterday I heard Mozart. You can enjoy your classical music, country, rock-light - whatever you prefer.
5. Relax with reading. I love to read, and can thus in a book that I utilized to getno idea about the outside world. When do I need a break from pain that I read mysteries, travel, art or books. At the moment I'm from the art of Charley Harper, Cincinnati, an artist who is fascinated recently died. His graphic works make me smile and lift my spirits.
6. Enjoy a favorite well. Experts say eating mourners properly and that's good advice. But every so often I eat an ice cream sundae. It is a guilt-free ice cream, with sugar-free, fat-free ice cream and sugarSauce. The ice cream tastes as sweet as any other.
7. Paint a room. Color effects our emotions. Although my husband and I were in the throes of grief, we followed our decorating plans. We hired a professional painter and asked him to the kitchen, family room color, and a dining room. Our boring white walls are now a pale taupe. This color has warmth, has the room and I love to watch the changing shadows as the sun sets.
8. Take a nap. That sounds like advicea grandmother, it is good advice. The change from daylight saving time to standard threw my body clock. I woke up and was too early to draw in the late afternoon. My solution was the half-hour naps and she felt wonderful.
9. Allow yourself time. When it comes to making decisions, "says the New Leaf Resources website, you should resist pressure and to take your time. "Start slowly," says the site, and anyone push you make the decisions that you feel uncomfortable, that to do that. " I trustmy instincts because of my extensive experience of mourning.
10. Share your talents. I continued to do free writing, even in the midst of grief. Writing takes me away from pain and makes me focus on a topic. Many people have me for my letter thanked me and that makes me feel good inside. The Good Grief Center Web site says: "Good Grief is doing good." I hope you are good at are in many ways.
Copyright 2008 by Harriet Hodgson
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